Can Ye Feel So Now?

Can Ye Feel So Now? - Quentin L. Cook

"While anything that lessens commitment is of consequence, two relevant challenges are both prevalent and significant. The first is unkindness, violence, and domestic abuse. The second is sexual immorality and impure thoughts. These often precede and are at the root of the choice to be less committed.
How we treat those closest to us is of fundamental importance. Violence, abuse, lack of civility, and disrespect in the home are not acceptable—not acceptable for adults and not acceptable for the rising generation. My father was not active in the Church but was a remarkably good example, especially in his treatment of my mother. He used to say, “God will hold men responsible for every tear they cause their wives to shed.” This same concept is emphasized in “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.” It reads, “[Those] who abuse spouse or offspring … will one day stand accountable before God.” Regardless of the culture in which we are raised, and whether our parents did or did not abuse us, we must not physically, emotionally, or verbally abuse anyone else.
The need for civility in society has never been more important. The foundation of kindness and civility begins in our homes. It is not surprising that our public discourse has declined in equal measure with the breakdown of the family. The family is the foundation for love and for maintaining spirituality. The family promotes an atmosphere where religious observance can flourish. There is indeed “beauty all around when there’s love at home.”"

I was impressed that Elder Cook considers unkindness to be similar in importance to violence and abuse. I do feel that kindness and civility are forgotten virtues in the world these days, and also are sometimes lacking in our home. This is something that I have been hoping to improve in our family.

I recently found a book on parenting that I really like called Positive Discipline. It suggests that once a week at a family meeting, each person in the family give every other person a sincere compliment. We have tried that for a couple of weeks and the kids seem to really enjoy it. I hope this small habit can help kindness become easier for all of us.

And a Little Child Shall Lead Them

And a Little Child Shall Lead Them - Boyd K. Packer

"One of the great discoveries of parenthood is that we learn far more about what really matters from our children than we ever did from our parents. We come to recognize the truth in Isaiah’s prophecy that “a little child shall lead them.” ”

I have definitely found this to be true. I learned a lot from my parents, but my children are helping me to learn, grow, and develop so much more. I have been stretched to my limits and forced to figure out what is really important in life. Having kids forces me to be active and not just sit back and passively observe. Although I don't really enjoy being a leader, I am responsible for my children and I have to do my best to guide them and be an example for them. Having that responsibility has really helped me to push myself, even if I feel like I'm barely keeping up with them.

"Our parents served faithfully in their most important calling—as parents. Our father led our home in righteousness, never with anger or fear. And the powerful example of our father was magnified by the tender counsel of our mother. The gospel is a powerful influence in the life of every one of us in the Packer family and to the next generation and the next generation and the next, as far as we have seen."

I also enjoyed Pres. Packer's thoughts on the importance of the family. He mentions that his parents did not have prominent callings in the church and his father might even be considered less active. But his parents lived the gospel at home. What happens at home is more important than what happens at church or anywhere else.