Can Ye Feel So Now?

Can Ye Feel So Now? - Quentin L. Cook

"While anything that lessens commitment is of consequence, two relevant challenges are both prevalent and significant. The first is unkindness, violence, and domestic abuse. The second is sexual immorality and impure thoughts. These often precede and are at the root of the choice to be less committed.
How we treat those closest to us is of fundamental importance. Violence, abuse, lack of civility, and disrespect in the home are not acceptable—not acceptable for adults and not acceptable for the rising generation. My father was not active in the Church but was a remarkably good example, especially in his treatment of my mother. He used to say, “God will hold men responsible for every tear they cause their wives to shed.” This same concept is emphasized in “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.” It reads, “[Those] who abuse spouse or offspring … will one day stand accountable before God.” Regardless of the culture in which we are raised, and whether our parents did or did not abuse us, we must not physically, emotionally, or verbally abuse anyone else.
The need for civility in society has never been more important. The foundation of kindness and civility begins in our homes. It is not surprising that our public discourse has declined in equal measure with the breakdown of the family. The family is the foundation for love and for maintaining spirituality. The family promotes an atmosphere where religious observance can flourish. There is indeed “beauty all around when there’s love at home.”"

I was impressed that Elder Cook considers unkindness to be similar in importance to violence and abuse. I do feel that kindness and civility are forgotten virtues in the world these days, and also are sometimes lacking in our home. This is something that I have been hoping to improve in our family.

I recently found a book on parenting that I really like called Positive Discipline. It suggests that once a week at a family meeting, each person in the family give every other person a sincere compliment. We have tried that for a couple of weeks and the kids seem to really enjoy it. I hope this small habit can help kindness become easier for all of us.

Teachings of Jacob

But behold, my brethren, is it expedient that I should awake you to an awful reality of these things? Would I harrow up your souls if your minds were pure? Would I be plain unto you according to the plainness of the truth if ye were freed from sin? ...Come, my brethren, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the waters; and he that hath no money, come buy and eat; yea, come buy wine and milk without money and without price. - 2 Nephi 9:47, 50

I've had this thought before, but reading these words from Jacob really struck me today. Our God is not an angry God. Although sometimes we need to be called to repentance, this call is really a gentle invitation to come and partake of all the good that is available to us. I know that repentance does bring the "peace that passeth all understanding." (Phil. 4:7)

Therefore, cheer up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves—to choose the way of everlasting death or the way of eternal life. - 2 Nephi 10:23

It is truly a blessing that we are able to choose for ourselves. We are free to choose the path that will lead to happiness.

In the Arms of His Love

"Some years ago in the Salt Lake Tabernacle, Elder Marion D. Hanks conducted a panel discussion. Included in that panel was an attractive and able young woman, divorced, the mother of seven children then ranging in ages from 7 to 16. She said that one evening she went across the street to deliver something to a neighbor. Listen to her words, as I recall them:
“As I turned around to walk back home, I could see my house lighted up. I could hear echoes of my children as I had walked out of the door a few minutes earlier. They were saying: ‘Mom, what are we going to have for dinner?’ ‘Can you take me to the library?’ ‘I have to get some poster paper tonight.’ Tired and weary, I looked at that house and saw the light on in each of the rooms. I thought of all of those children who were home waiting for me to come and meet their needs. My burdens felt heavier than I could bear.
“I remember looking through tears toward the sky, and I said, ‘Dear Father, I just can’t do it tonight. I’m too tired. I can’t face it. I can’t go home and take care of all those children alone. Could I just come to You and stay with You for just one night? I’ll come back in the morning.’
“I didn’t really hear the words of reply, but I heard them in my mind. The answer was: ‘No, little one, you can’t come to me now. You would never wish to come back. But I can come to you.’”"

This story was in this talk in the most recent General Conference, but I also remember hearing the story when it was originally told in 2006 by President Hinckley. This story is so comforting to me. Of course, I am not a single mom, but I think we all have times where we feel alone and overwhelmed. I need to be better about inviting Heavenly Father into my life so I can feel His love and support for me. I know that when I do make the effort, He is always there for me.